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Priory Bowls Club

The View From The Ditch

A lighthearted look at what's going on at the club this week.

Seconds Out Round 1!

I had an email form Eddie Hearns yesterday, seems he heard about an altercation at the end of Monday's Mixed Midweek Triples game against Northern Parade and would like to have the rematch on the next Anthony Joshua fight undercard. There seems to be an epidemic going around as I also hear a certain person who the Yorkshire Terrier gave a drubbing to also had an altercation this week. The lesson to learn from this is you don't mess with Milton Ladies.

Heave It Up August

Remember when you used to put the woods & blow them up the green in August? Seems all this hot weather has had a strange effect on the green as instead of being lightening fast it's slow & heavy. Saying that it was the same as Gas Social in the Midweek Triples, ask Arthur's rink!!, on the plus side it seems like the Aintree official have been down and removed the Beechers Brooks which have blighted the green of late.

Looking at the Combination 1 table the Priory boys were both doing battle with the top 2 this week, the B team at home to Cowplain Red whilst the C team were down at the Champions elect Waverley Blue. See the Captain's log for match reports on both games.


More  Shocks Than the World Cup

If Brazil & Spain (notice I didn't say Germany & Argentina) not getting far in the World Cup  wasn't enough of a shock this summer then what went on during a couple of club competitions put them in perspective. Two defending champions deposed in one night, firstly Scouseshire's finest went down on a bumpy surface to the club captain in the Club Singles (playing east to west into the sun?) 21-11 and secondly the Midweek Triples captain, former Captain Birdseye, Terry beat our local retailer Roly by 1 shot on the 22nd end. 

Well done to the David's for beating the Goliath's and keeping the spirit of competition alive.

Lightening Fast Dustbowl

With the continuing dry weather it seems the "green' just south of Albert Road is getting very dusty and it seems very fast. I know it is one of the smallest greens around but I here one member of the B team managed to put 8 in the ditch during the game 8/42, that's roughly every 5th wood. No it wasn't M's secretary.

Yorkshire Terrier Bites Yer Cherry

After disposing of Milton Park bowlers in rapid time in earlier rounds, Nigel "Yorkshire Terrier" Brown turned his attention to Eastney's Brian Cherry in the quarter finals of the Inter Club Singles, needless to say he came away with another win but this time it wasn't so easy. Going into the last four which looks like to be dominated by Milton Ladies, let's hope he doesn't emulate the Scouser's performance in an earlier round.

Local Bookie Fails To Pay Out

A few punters were sat watching the singles quarter final between Kath's caddy &  Liverpool's finest export to Hampshire. On a bumpy rink 1 Den was sitting pretty when Smiffy started to fight back, the park bench bookie started offering odds, with Den 20-19 up and Steve on the charge he calmly offered 7/1 against Den, we snatched his hand off. Smiffy got it to 20-20 and the odds shortened only for Den to put the game to bed. No wonder the bookie had a heart attack earlier this season offering odds like that.

Walk Overs

Seeing as the deadline for the current round of the club competitions was last weekend I have been inputting the scores to generate the next rounds and was amazed at how many Walk Overs there were. In fact 1 player has reached the quarter final of 3 competitions without bowling a wood, being drawn in 2 competitions against the same person who is out for the season due to a dodgy ticker.


Not Like A Carpet

Moving into the second half of the Combination season,  last years Division 1 Champions captain took over the reins while Capt Fred sought some sunshine abroad with Waterlooville Gold being the visitors to the grass at Milton Park Soth rink. With Bloomers also off on his holidays there were pacemaker technicians on hand as we welcomed the return of Dozzer and after 7 weeks carrying Kath's bag Den was allowed out to play.

Playing on rink 3 Mike Fryatt's four were having a field day going 15 ends without the opposition getting on the scoreboard and at the 2/3 stage were 31-0 up, Meanwhile over in the shadows on rink 6 Arthur Newland's rebuilt rink were steadily plugging away to be 18-8 up at the same point. On the 3rd rink, stand in skip Mike Elliott, also with a rebuilt rink, were just starting to fade away after leading at half way as they went on a losing streak of 5 ends conceding 12 shots leaving just 3 ends to claw back 8 shots but some find saves by the opposition skip saw them go down by 5. Still with the other rinks winning comfortably 10 points in the bag and a healthy shot difference of 74-45 ensued.


News From My Roving Reporter

Had a message today from the Yorkshire Terrier today to say that the Northern Alliance took on Buzz Aldrin & Matt Marchant down at Waverley today in the County Pairs and came away losing by just 2 shots after just 22 ends. It was a busy weekend for the Terrier who the previous day added another scalp to his belt by beating Club Captain & last years 2 Wood Singles runner up Richard Smalley 17-8 in the same competition. Meanwhile the Scouser was off in Middleton Cup action for Hampshire against Buckinghamshire, although Hampshire lost overall Smiffy was part of Steve Feilder's winning rink. Playing a second game today Smiffy took on Gary Linter in the Handicap Singles giving away an 8 start he found himself on the brink of defeat at 20-4 down, then Linda Gibbs went home, he then dug deep to come back and win 21-20.    Shock result of the round of the Handicap Singles was when your Webmaster(playing his first singles game in about 10 years) went down 21-13 to Chirpy Mundy who worked hard to overcome his massive -3 (!!!) start.


Chirpy Keeps His Cool Against Fareham

For all those who are upset that I don't report on makes I'm not involved in,I had a text from Chirpy to give me some details about the game against Fareham.:

"My rink was 19-15 up on the last end,we were 3 shots down and me and Tom Pullin with a wood left each, I'm sure h fancied drawing another shot to draw the rink but I went first and picked up the jack to make it 6 to us. Tom could only cut one out so we had 5 shots to win 24-15, Happy Days" (the report is word for word from the text so apologies for the grammar,he was probably dreaming of building extensions in English lessons)

 Priory went on to win the game 85-68 13 points to 3, from what I heard today other results went favourably for the Pro's who are sitting nicely in 2nd place in Division 1.

This weeks league game is Monday night with Friday's game postponed to play the Top Club match against Lee on Solent at home.


Priory Defeat Cosham Park Red in Midweek Two & 2/3rds

On a lovely sunny afternoon on a flat fast green at Cosham 8 players turned up to take on the home side. After being sternly read the rules about turning up short and having an automatic loss of 2 points plus a 10 shot penalty we eventually got on the green. By tea 2 rinks were well ahead whilst Andy Hibberd & George Bradrick were holding their own and not being too far adrift. Following tea Andy started to whither of rabbiting by the opposition skip in his ear and began to fall away. Meanwhile a fast green was helping "Chucker" get closer & even through the head, with JP coming away with a good victory, whilst on the other rink Arthur was in comfortable command romping to a 14 shot win. With a final score of 64-42 or after the 10 shot deduction 54-42 and 10 points to 2 or was it 8-4 seeing as they won the 2v3 game, then again do they get 2 points and we should only of played the 2 triples minus 10 so we won 42-19 10-2, no doubt I will get a stern email from the Midweek Secretary telling me where I have gone wrong.

Oh forgot to mention I was captain of the day because Capt Terry has been suffering eyesight problems, overdoing rum rations, and after bumping into things and nearly getting run over had an emergency appointment at the hospital this afternoon.

Had a nice reply from the Midweek Secretary, seems I was nearly right:

the triple that was 1 short is recorded as a 10-0 defeat

so have i got it right, corrected scores are as follows (Cosham 1st)

10 0 
11 29 
8 23 
giving a match score of 29 52 

Worked out better with the shot difference on DW's version of the rules, bonus


Waverley Extract Revenge

I knew it would all end in tears, after the C/A team gave their Blue team a walloping on Wednesday night the remaining 12 Waverley non players joined the others to extract their revenge with a 30 shot victory on Friday night. When the 5th choice reserve, only ever called up against Waverley, left only "Marathon Man" was holding a lead whilst next door "Chirpy" had just relinquished his lead. I won't mention the other 2 rinks but full praised to "Abba" Hibberd who was giving Danny Smith a good run for his money at the front end of Roly's rink.

On the plus side it was good to see Steve Watt up and about down there supporting his team mates.

Milton Mauler Continues His Rampage

After disposing of the Milton Park Competition Secretary in rapid time in the first round the Yorkshire Terrier powered through the next round of the Interclub Singles by sweeping aside the Milton Park Steward by 21 shots to 5 in a bit longer 14 ends.

After a short rest he then made his debut as a skip in the Midweek Triples and continued his mauling by winning 28-6 against Gas Social. His compatriot skips also put in rink winning performances with John Peacham winning by 5 shots after being 11-1 up after 8 ends, while Arthur Newland endured a game of crash to haul in  shots on the 16th end to get them back level which demoralised the Gasmen and take 3 shots from the last 2 ends to win by 3.


Club Before County

Not being a Pro or marquee player I have no interest in P& D or County or World Bowls games so am biased towards playing for the club rather than seeking glory on the trophy circuits. When asking where our regular number 3 was tonight when we were down to a bear 12 players I was shocked to hear he was off playing a Mixed Fours game along side a Milton Park player!! The question is did Wattie lend him one of his old shirts to play in? Still Roly played well tonight to keep Fred's unbeaten record intact.


County Sunday Morning

Your correspondent wandered over the green for a roll up and found a couple of County competitions going on, firstly there was Steve "Middleton Cup" Smith & Nigel "Pot hunter" Brown taking on a couple of scruffs in a game of pairs on rink 3 whilst on the Pro's Rink Martin "Tortoise" Eggleton was taking on a player from Bedhampton in what looked like a marathon game of singles. While the Northerners romped to a 12-0 lead against Barry & Danny the singles match seemed to be a close old affair with Martin's age old tactic of taking the mat up and playing short to the ditch was backfiring on him as ne constantly put the jack in the ditch handing the Jack to his opponent. A ripple of applause did break out when he managed to do it on 2 ends consecutively. The watching Club Coach did offer his services on how to deliver the Jack.

Steve & Nigel made their way into the next round with a comfortable 23-12 victory, whilst at the time of writing I understand they are still playing in the marathon match and the scorer has send a message for his breakfast to be delivered.


I have just received a text from  the marker to say the match has finally ended after a marathon 2 hours 50 minutes, some athletes can run 26 miles in a hell of a lot less time, and 33 ends requiring 2 scorecards with the home player losing 20-21. 41 shots in 33 ends I think that beats the Newland v Mundy singles club game of a couple of years ago. The green manager was just getting the goal out ready for a penalty shoot out when the game ended.

Priory B Win the In Firm Derby

Priory B/A took on the auld enemy A/B on a green which had more jumps than Aintree and hadn't seen a mower for 5 day on a dreary end of May night. The home side playing on rink 5 skipped by Mike Fryatt got off to a flyer scoring a 7 on the 4th end to race into a 14-0 lead, faster than when Nigel Brown demolished a Milton player (see below), only for the wheels to come off and them not scoring again for the next 5 ends, Meanwhile on rinks 2 & 3 Capt Fred & Arthur were holding their own in what started fairly tight games.

Half Time Score: MF 19-8, FH 12-5 AN 12-4 43-17


Following tea the auld enemy brought on a substitute for Ted Coward, who is struggling with his health, bringing on Chippy McCain on the rink against Arthur. Things continued to go Priory's way especially on rink 5 where Dave Saunders was pecking away at Mike's lead only for Mike to play some shot saving woods creating big turnovers, 4 down to 1 or 2 up much to Dave Brown's frustration. At the other end Arthur was being pegged back as the mist started to roll in, while Fred kept a healthy distance away from Reid. However, with a gloomy mist closing in over the green everyone kept their nerve to finish up with a full house of 12 points with Fred winning by 9, Arthur sneaking home by 1 shot and Mike winning by 11. The game on rink 5 was not so much a game of 2 half but a 1/5 & 4/5 with Mike winning 14 -0 and then losing 14-17. In fact the second half scores were MF 9-9, FH 12-10 & AN 7-14  28-33

Final Score: MF 28-17, FH 24-15, AN 19-18 71-50  12 points to 0

More photos in the Gallery of this game


PS: has anyone any luminous paint a number 3 can use? he is struggling to tell the difference between brown and black woods so needs a bit of help to identify his own woods.


New Milton Park Competition Announced 

Following an InterClub Singles match today, the auld enemy have announced a new competition, The Dave Meyer Eights. This has been instigated after a certain Yorkshire man taking just 8 ends and 25 minutes to administer a 21-0 defeat on the Milton Park Competition Secretary. There is no truth in the rumour that the Northerner has been offered honorary membership to the auld enemy.

Pompey 21 Liverpool 17

A little bird, well a big Northern one actually, whispered in my ear last night that a certain Pompey fan avenged the defeat in the 1992 FA Cup Semi Final by beating a Liverpool fan 21-17 in the Inter Club Singles Competition. There is no truth in the rumours that this game was being watched by Hampshire Bowls selectors and he has now been transferred to Lancashire Bowls.


You Can't Keep A Secret From Me

Despite being thousands of miles away in another time zone you can't keep news from your intrepid blogger, I was sat here sipping an Efes when Sky Sports News cut away to P&D BA Combination results, we it was more like a text message and then a Facebook message. Seems Arthur Newland's newly reconstructed rink picked up their first point of the season in a drawn match on his favourite rink 6. Captain Fred kept his unbeaten run, despite being missing his number 2 and Mike Fryatt also broke his duck when the defending champions hit Lee on Solent B 11-1 with a massive 73-52 win.

Meanwhile across the divide Juan Bounce's team took all 12 points off the auld enemy Milton Park B, but looking at the score 69-43.75 one suspects the opposition were struggling to field a full team, not gone back to Bournemouth again have they?

Speaking on being 1 short, word has reached me that the Mid Week Triples trio were in fact 2 triples & a pair but failed to overcome Vospers Red on Tuesday afternoon by just 7 shots  to make it 1 win in 2 For Captain Meaden RN's crew.



End of A Busy Week 

The games came thick & fast this week, Monday the A team caned Vospers, Wednesday saw the B team win the Combination battle with the C team, next came the first game of the Midweek Triples season. On a sunny afternoon Capt Meaden's Crew took on College Park Red at Milton Park, in years gone by they've been queuing up to get a game but this year the squad is scant, so if you fancy an afternoon game get your name down. Back to the game, Andy ' New Woods' Hibberd took on the evergreen Roy Lowless on Rink 2 in a low scoring game which after 14 ends only 15 shots had been scored, unfortunately that was when we hit the buffers scoring only 1 more shot in the last 7 ends and losing 8-14.  On Rink 4 John Peacham's rink went off like a train being 11-4 up at the half way stage, they kept up the pressure in the second half to win by a commanding 21-8. The 3rd rink on the middle rink saw Arthur Newland take on former Milton Park's Roy Carter, coming up to tea it was 8-4 in advantage to the home team then a 6 pushed the lead even further only for 2 ends later for the opposition to grab a 6 to pull it back to a 1 shot game. Obviously the big drop hurt as the home team never lost another end scoring 9 shots in the last 4 ends to win 23-13. Priory 52-35 College Park Red 10-2 points wise.
Friday night saw the first 32 pointer of the season in League 1, last years 2nd against 3rd. Your correspondent wasn't there so had to rely on text messages to keep up with the action. It seems at the half way point the Priory team were well in command but the Alex were battling back, as the rinks finished in a tight game Nigel Mundy finished 3 down, this was compensated by a 4 shot win by Roly Bloy, Martin Eggleton, who wasn't the last to finish for a change, extended the lead by winning by 2. The final rink skipped by Adrian "Indoors" Snook went into the last end with Priory up by 2 overall, unfortunately with only 1 wood in the head the lead was precarious as the Alex skip took it out to give the home team a 6 and the game overall 74- 78 and only 4 points to 12.
In the words of a former Pompey manger who liked his drink "We go again next week". All four games next week are at home, well the C team cross the divide to play the auld enemy Milton Park B. It'll be interesting how many players on Wednesday night playing for the Lee on Solent B team will return in Friday for the first team game?


Banter Game

Nice of the fixtures secretary to arrange a nice grudge match so early in the season. After starting the season away on the bumpy carpet the defending champions returned to home scarified grass with a game against the last seasons Div 2 champions our C team. With dwindling numbers and squads near enough every available league player was on the green.
On Rink 4 it was a battle between the Newland & Mundy families for the honours, on the same rink they had battled out a pairs match on Sunday,in a tight game which ebbed & flowed with the lead changing hands on a regular basis it was Andy 'new woods' Hibberd who kept his unbeaten record aided by a chirpy number 3 to win by 5 shots.
Rink 3 saw club captain Richie Smalley lead his band of new members, the Linter family plus late reserve John Peacham to a single shot win over Mick Fryatt's seasoned rink.
In the 3rd and final rink on 2 it saw the battle of the captains, Fred Hammal & the Spanish International bowler Juan Bounce or as he is known on his passport Mick Jinman. In a similar vein to last week Fred raced off to a commanding lead early on but restricted the fight back to low scores when on the 20th end Juan's rink  bounced to double figures while Fred had already amassed 21 shots.
With the 2 end rinks already finished it was a case of Mick trying to defend a slender 2 shot lead overall but managed to pick up 2 shots so the defending Champions had to settle for a 4 shot win and only 8 points while the C team winning on 2 rinks grabbed 4 points.


First Points On The Board

Following the postponement of their game on Friday due to a few spots of rain the A team got their season under way with a visit to Alexandra Park to take on Vospers. In a one sided game the away side romped to a 16-0 victory winning by a massive margin of 63 shots to win 114-51. Leading the way, & probably last to finish was the rink skipped by Martin Eggleton who won by a huge 21 shots, next to was Roly Bloy with a 19 shot victory then Adrian Snook who won by 18, the closest game being Nigel Munday who scaled through by 5.

Next up is last years runners up Alexandra BC who have lost a few players over the winter so a good chance to what we are made of in an early season 32 pointer.

Glorious April & A New Season Begins

After a lovely week of weather for the pre season Friendlies, what should the weather do when the Combination season begin but throw it down with rain and chuck a few hailstones to liven things up, well it was like that at the Leaning green of the Waterlooville carpet, I hear they had thunder & lightening at Lovedean as well.

With 2 new captains in place the Combination sides took on 2 Waterlooville sides, the Champions B team up at the carpet again the Gold team while the newly promoted C team took on the Greens. In a close game over the hill, Fred Hammal's rink went off like a train scoring 10 in the first 3 ends then got caught with a signal failure for the next 5 ends where the hosts pulled it back to 10-6, once the signal was lifted they went on to win 10 of the remaining 13 ends to finish 26-14 up. Meanwhile on rink 1 Mike Fryatt was having at ding dong battle with the lead swapping frequently, going into the last end 2 behind and 3 in the game they only managed to pick up 1 shot and going down 15-16. Sandwiched in between was Arthur Newland who had to suffer waiting for 2 late arrivals which obviously disrupted their preparations, despite winning the first 2 ends it all went pear shaped after that winning only 6 more ends and finishing up 9-23 down. It seems in the close season M has been working on his secretary's strength as quite a few of his woods were ending up in the ditch.

Meanwhile back at the home green the newly promoted Div 2 Champions took on the Waterlooville Green, last years Div 1 runners up only to suffer a 48-69 defeat with only Andy Hibberd being able to gain any points. So both teams sit with just 2 points after the first round of games.

14-0 after 4 ends!!! 14-0 after 4 ends!!!
Water Looville soggy carpet Water Looville soggy carpet